Commande.

And the plot thickens. Each and every day of our lives the "plot" of our story line thickens with twists and turns, even 'kinks' in the road to throw us off, make us swerve and compromise our good positions in life. The word 'Commande' is French for "Control or order". Commande is something that is a real and constant struggle in this life of mine. Hello, my name is Anna and I am a control freak. There.... I said it. I want to be in complete control of my life. I want to control my home, my body, my health, my work, my success, my circumstances, my everyday challenges and so much more. It has proven hard to admit over the years but I have come to terms with it and tried to embrace and overcome it all at the same time. However, overcoming a constant urge for control can prove to be more than challenging. 

When I try to control and things don't go the way I designed them to, I get irritable, upset or completely thrown off track. When things don't go the way I designed them to..I get upset. I get confused and I am swiftly jolted out of my comfort zone....lost...confused...and upset. Why is this happening? What am I supposed to do now? This completely throws everything off track... ugh. 

The answer to this quandary is so simple.

This weekend I got a text from someone very special to me that said something along the lines of "you have to trust that God is in control and will take care of things." What a simple text. Duh, right? Of course God is in control and of course he will take care of me, right??? That is something that is so easy to say but so wildly complicated to live. When I read the words of that text, my heart melted. The simple words were so true and so meaningful to me in a time of need. Instead of my regular "Anna, you've got this," my heart knelt and said "No, Anna, you DON'T have this... God does...and that's SO much better." It's so easy to try to be in control of our lives and every facet of it, but the truth is... we are all ill-equipped. We were not created to handle such control. I may think I was and that my ways are better and more comfortable and make more sense to me... but, the truth is... I'm very ill-equipped. 

If you read the touching guest post from Cassandra at Faith, Hope and Love last week on her one word resolution of "Surrender" then you must be saying to yourself..."Did Anna even read her own freakin guest post? Obviously not." And the truth is... no. I mean, I read the words.... but I didn't open my mind and heart to what the words said and how they could affect my life everyday. Like in any good ole' western, John Wayne will ask the enemy to surrender and if they don't, he will eventually force them to whether by physical force or fire. We all know... they always surrender....Nobody wants to mess with John Wayne. As odd as it sounds, our lives can be like this. God 'asks' us to surrender control, but most of the time we don't... eventually, he will take your world and flip it completely upside down and all you have left to do is throw your hands in the air and say "Commande." Surrender control. Give it up. We are all ill-equipped. As completely scary and mind blowing as it may seem.... TRUST. Give up control and trust that God will work it out. The results are always sweet... :)