I feel like a Desperate Housewife. They should really make a series called "The Real Housewives of the Boro." Even though I'm not a housewife, I would fudge on an application and try out anyways.
Somewhere between Monday morning and Monday night, I caught "The funk." The dreadful, stuffy nose, head congestion, ears hurting, groggy, disconbobulated funk. (When I typed in "disconbobulated" spell check told me it was spelt incorrectly.. I mean, how else do you spell it?!)
I digress... This funk that I speak of has led me to a half day of "sick time" off of work. I forced myself to put on some makeup and get my butt in to work this morning, but I just could not make it. I made myself come home. I think this is the second sick day I have taken in year years. That's how legit this is.
I'm one of those brats that whenever people get sick I think in the back of my mind really hateful things like "You're probably sick because you eat Hardee's everyday." or "If I had as many diet Sundrops a day as you, I would be sick all of the time too." Rude, I know. All of those nasty comments in my mind have forced karma to give me this funk.
Being home this afternoon has really taught me some things about the neighborhood that I would have never learned otherwise. Like this:
1. A chubby ethnic kid walks up and down our driveway every time he gets on or off the schoolbus. I hope he doesn't fall or something. I mean, would my liability insurance cover that? Anyways..
2. There are 12, thats right, TWELVE open storage violations in our neighborhood. You better believe I will be reporting these things- because I'm neighborhood watch-ish like that.
3. Abe sleeps all day. When I am at work, I always imagine Abe running around the house like crazy and doing backward flips off of the couches, but the truth is that he actually just sleeps all day.
4. I love the show Fixer Upper. She's like... ME. Except she has much better hair and personality.
How does clint just build ANYTHING JoJo tells him to? Why are JoJo's kids so cute?
5. One of three things is happening:
A. Abe is trying to open our Christmas gifts.
B. The tape i bought to wrap gifts with is crap.
C. The gas heat is making the tape come off of the wrapped gifts.
Which is it?
6. If I really was a housewife I would need some serious hobbies.
7. I saw my grandaddy today and when we parted he said "If the Lord comes back, Ill see you in Heaven." Although that was weird, my reply was almost weirder : "Seeya in Hev."
8. Online shopping and/or QVC is for people who take sick days. Or housewives.
9. Even though my energy level is really low right now, I always have energy to vaccum.
And that just about covers it. At this point, I am really looking forward to the mailman coming because I am really hoping my Deeply Rooted Magazine comes in.
The funk is funky.